Tools for worship leaders

I'm all about things that help me do the things I do more easily, more intuitively, more quickly, and more effectively. Insert the requisite commentary on the irreplaceability of hard work and the futility of "instant" solutions. But helpful tools are just, well, helpful! And I've managed to accumulate a handful as I've developed as a worship leader over the past 4 or 5 years, and it seemed appropriate to document them someplace. So here goes.


1. Chord charting software.
First off, let me say that I'm obsessive about how my chord charts look. Formatting and fonts have changed a bit over the years, but I've always made my own charts vs. buying them or downloading ones off the internet. Mainly because I don't trust the ones posted online on various sites (and there are legality issues, evidently... see here), and it seems silly to me to pay for them especially if I want the chart to follow a specific arrangement. Purchasing charts from CCLI, FQ Worship, or similar sites is perfectly fine... but if you want more control over how they look and how they're arranged, you gotta do it yourself. In the past there were word processors like MS Word, etc. The downside to this is that once you've lined up your chord notation to the lyric, if you change fonts everything gets realigned and you have to reset all the spacing. John Huss solved this problem with a cool app called Chord Chart Wizard (chordchartwizard.googlepages.com). Basically your "edit" page is always a font of uniform character width, so once you set your chord/lyric alignment, you can choose to display your chart in whatever font you want, and the app makes sure stuff is still aligned as originally intended. Neat. It also has basic set creation features where you can see all your songs in a list and search by key, tempo, keyword, theme, etc. I have my small laundry list of things I wish it did differently/better, but so far I haven't found anything that does what it does better, and I've looked.

2. Music subscription service.
This is like Netflix for your music. If you've never thought about music this way before, it might be a tough switch. I pay $10-15/month to "rent" whatever music I want. I don't "own" the tracks, and can't legally burn them to CD. I'm only "licensed" to use them while I'm a paying subscriber on a limited number of computers/devices. But for the cost of one CD or album's worth of music a month, I can listen to ANYTHING*... (*a select few artists choose not to allow their music under this form of licensing, but not any worship music I've come across yet). This is an incredible resource for a worship leader that can't be overstated. A few years back I budgeted for 1-2 CDs a month as I worked to expand my catalog of worship songs, and now for the cost of 1 I can look up just about anything. The two options I'm aware of that offer this type of service is Rhapsody (www.rhapsody.com) and Microsoft's Zune (www.zune.net), although Zune requires their specific mp3 player for portable use while Rhapsody works on my LG phone (and now supports iPhone/iPod). Yes, yes... I know the rest of the world uses iTunes... and if iTunes ever offered a subscription service, that would seal the deal for me as a 100% Apple convert. But if you're looking for new songs to introduce or new arrangements to old songs, this is almost an irreplaceable resource. I'm thinking about doing "Be Thou My Vision" this coming Sunday, and I just typed it into Rhapsody's search field... 200 hits. Most aren't what I'm looking for... but after listening to a few seconds of the first 100, I came across what I think is the best rendition of this hymn I've ever heard. What's that you say? New Hillsong Live album out? Let me pull it up and toss it on my phone for the ride home. 'Nuff said.

3. Administrative tools.
The basic idea is something that helps you schedule who plays each week and what you're playing. The two polished options that I'm aware of at the moment (and there are probably others) are FQ Worship (www.fqworship.com) and Planning Center Online (www.planningcenteronline.com). You create a "plan" or "event" and add the songs you're going to use along with which team members you'd like to have play. PCO supports sending out invites, which folks can accept or decline (although FQ is adding this soon), and both support hosting your charts and mp3 files for your team's reference (despite my previous point on Rhapsody, I still purchase individual mp3 files for the songs in my rotation so that team members can legally stream--not download--them). These administrative websites also cost money, between $10-20/month, but it's worth every penny in my book if you do this week in and week out. Some similar functionality for scheduling can be done for free using Google Calendar, but it's a bit more work to manage and maintain. FQ Worship contains other resources specific to strengthening worship leaders which is really cool, while PCO has some bells and whistles like CCLI reporting and SMS support for notifications... in fact, I just got a text that my drummer accepted for this week.

4. Online file sharing/storage.
One word... you may have even heard about it. Dropbox (www.dropbox.com). 2-8GB* of free cloud real estate (*you start with 2GB and get an extra 250 MB for every referral up to 8 GB). This is a great service for lots of things, but the reason I include it here in my list of tools for worship leaders is twofold. First, it provides a basic way for hosting/sharing of charts or mp3 files if you're not hosting them on one of the sites I mentioned above, and even a way to collaborate with team members, since shared folders can be written to by both the owner of the account and those to whom it's been shared. Secondly, if you're using something like Chord Chart Wizard, you can configure it to point to your Dropbox folder to use for it's song database. This is a perk only if you happen to use multiple computers. For example, I may start picking my set at lunch while at work on my computer there... later that evening I'll fire up CCW from my laptop at home and finish it. On rehearsal day, I'll go to the church and log into the church office computer, load up my set in CCW and print my charts. No thumb drives, no emailing of files, just Chord Chart Wizard on each computer seeing the changes I've made from any of the other computers. And if you have other people who occasionally lead worship, it's a great way of sharing the same catalog of songs. Dropbox can similarly be effective when you have multiple volunteers preparing slides and media. Many of the presentation software apps have licensing structures that allow volunteers to install the software at home to work on so they don't have to come to the church or use remote desktop (awfully-slow) to use the software on the church computer. If the slide/media files are saved into Dropbox, the folder can be shared with any volunteers working in that ministry. Lots of ways to use it, all of them good and helpful. So what are you waiting for? Go sign up!


So it should go without saying that none of these things replaces consistent and faithful dedication to studying God's word and spending time with Him in prayer as the primary path to effective ministry. This is, after all, worship... and we need to beware of making even small idols out of our skills or methods. But I hope these things can prove useful to others, they sure have been for me!

When worship "sucks"

Sorry for the slightly provocative subject, but I was given an interesting compliment after last Sunday's meeting from a relative of a friend who visited our church. The comment was along the lines of thanking me for an awesome time of worship and encouraging me to not underestimate the significance of my ministry. All well and good--to God be the glory for using a sinner like me for the praise of His name and the benefit of His people! But then an interesting contrast was presented, because you see, worship at this person's church "totally sucks" as of late, so our morning meeting had been a refreshing change.

Now let me be up front--when I hear comments that are critical of any meeting's worship, it usually tells me a bit more about the person making the comment than the actual quality of the worship being commented on. Now of course I don't profess to know the person's heart, and I can certainly discern quality of musical arrangement, musicianship, and presentation--and am keenly aware of when any of those elements fall short when I'm leading. And in this example, I get what she was saying and I thanked her for being there and that God is able to use me in some way to bring people worshipfully into His presence.

But it got me to thinking, at this person's church, someone is spending time to pick and prepare songs and work with volunteers to present an offering of worship each and every week. Unless they have a rotation of worship leaders, that's the logistical bare minimum. Perhaps this person spends more time trying to work out a smooth flow to the set or how to call the congregation into worship or how to most appropriately bring God's people before Him in prayer. And maybe this person even works to offer creative arrangements to the songs. I can attest to the fact that all of these things can add up to a significant amount of time and effort. Maybe this person is also a volunteer and receives no pay for this role. And this person is a brother (or sister) in Christ, but it "totally sucks."

At this point I'll be the first to say that round pegs don't fit into square holes, and it's not at all outside of the realm of possibilities that this person--as genuine as their heart may be--just isn't in the right role according to their giftedness, and for whatever reasons, others have not sufficiently come alongside this person to help them find what that role truly is for them in God's kingdom. Maybe there's nobody else at the moment and they're filling a gap. Maybe they actually are quite capable but have other challenges with the volunteers that are involved in maintaining the desired standard of musical quality. Or maybe they're a bit despondent or just getting by each week. All that to say there could certainly be legitimate cases for needing someone else in that role, or at least the need for renewing or ongoing discipleship to encourage this person's growth in their walk with the Lord and in their ability as a worship leader.

In any case, it's worth remembering that all of us are broken sinners who bring broken offerings each and every week and that only through Christ's atoning work on the cross are we made whole and are our offerings accepted. And praise God for that! There are sometimes weeks where I get more caught up in new musical arrangements that are "just gonna rock!" only to show up on Sunday and have flubs all over the place--yet God shows up and is worshipped heartily by His people... and I receive a lesson in humbleness and priorities. Worship was "great" but it clearly had nothing to do with me. And honestly, that's the best place to be. We strive each week to bring and offer our best, while remembering that it's not about us--and that's a good thing.

So back to my original example that seems to reflect the sentiment of a "consumer" approach to worship--whether or not that was this particular person's heart, God knows. I'm inclined to root for the struggling worship leader or the meeting that just "isn't happening", because I know what goes into the process and all the challenges that come with it--and I know that the genuine worship of our Savior isn't dependent on our skill or musical preference. But it raises the question--how do we combat a "consumer" approach to worship--both in our own hearts and in the hearts of those we lead and shepherd? How ought we to respond to comments like the one I received in a way that points them towards an understanding of true worship and towards a bigger view of the Savior?

One thing I realized (to my fault) was that I passed up an opportunity to pray for that situation right then and there. I could have hopefully reflected the heart of God on what is happening at this person's church. It could have gone something like this: "Father, thank you that you allow us into your presence to worship you. You are worthy of more than we could ever offer you, but you accept us because of Jesus. We desire to worship you in spirit and in truth, seeing you more for who you really are. Bless my friend's church with leadership and servants who you can use to help your people truly worship you. Thank you for the gift of music. Raise up skilled musicians who will offer vibrant and creative worship with the gifts you've given them. Whether you use those who have already been serving or you bring new people, worship is ultimately all about you. Help us to understand that more as you mold our hearts and make us more like Jesus." This could have served to lift up the situation immediately before the Lord, affirm that musical quality matters, but reflect on the fact that it doesn't matter most.

Now the discussion on how to shepherd a group of worshippers away from consumerism and towards true worship is a broad one, but I realized there can be much to learn from thoughtfully processing the comments we receive after our meetings. In the end, God is about His glory and our hearts, and last I checked, neither of those are dependent on musical quality or style. When worship "sucks", people are usually referring to the music... but music is just a tool--a very powerful and effective tool--but not a master. We serve one master in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and let's strive to keep it that way.

Happy Valentine’s Debacle!

Let me just preface this by saying that in the end, we had a pretty darned good day. There were, however, plenty of opportunities for me to doubt that outcome, and hey—it’s about being together, right? Well the likelihood of so many things going wrong in a single day (let alone on Valentine’s Day) has reeled me back into the blogosphere. So here I go.

The day started off like any other day—alarm fired off at 7:30am, I hit the snooze bar 2-3 times in defiance… until I am coherent enough to recall that today was actually a special day and an occasion for not going into work. That’s ok, I’m sure they won’t miss me. In fact, I’d be willing to bet money that nobody even knew I was gone. As my wife later said, “that’s sort of good and bad.” After these realizations I opted for “off” vs. “snooze” the 4th go around, and went back to bed. I must not have been as coherent as I thought I was or else I wouldn’t have done such a foolish thing as the next time my eyes opened it was just shy of noon. Yes that’s right, noon. Not exactly my plan, but hey that’s alright; I must have needed the sleep. Incidentally, my mother would often say that and I’m not sure where it originated from… and I ALWAYS need the sleep—usually the sleep I’m not getting—and I WISH it were a valid excuse for sleeping in every day. [Sigh] But I digress…

So on our agenda for the day was a number of possibilities, the most immediate attractions being food and the San Diego Zoo. It had to have been after 2pm by the time we gathered ourselves and got out the door… and we opted for Mimi’s café. They serve breakfast all day, and darn-it, that’s what we wanted—who cares that it was almost 3pm! After eating an excellent breakfast, we hit the road en route for the zoo. Mind you it’s just after 4pm at this time, and once we’re south of North County San Diego, southbound traffic starts backing up as people head home from working in Sorrento Valley to their homes in PB and Mission Valley—all that to say I could have found nicer parking lots to sit in if that’s what we were interested in doing. There was heavy traffic from La Jolla pretty much all the way to downtown. Joy. So at long last we get to the zoo and pull in to park. Parking lot is VERY empty. Bad sign. So empty, in fact, that we’re able to park in the very front row. That never happens… unless, of course, the zoo was closed. Silly me… winter hours… they close at 4pm. Well at least there are bathrooms just outside the gates.

So there we are sitting in the car, in the front row of the zoo parking lot (score!), trying to figure out what to do next. Other items on the possible agenda were to hit up a movie (we’d been wanting to see “Night at the Museum”), something involving Heidi bringing along a pair of socks, and a late reservation at the Macaroni Grill. Naturally, the paper I jotted movie times down on got left at home. Good thing we have GPS on our phones that allow us to find movie theaters around our location along with their phone numbers. With the advent of the internet, has anyone actually called a movie theater to get show times lately? I think I had to sit 6 minutes into the call before getting to the times to our film for Edwards. So we’re already almost downtown since the zoo is in Balboa Park, so Heidi suggests heading to Horton Plaza. I typically don’t care to go downtown as the driving usually stresses me out and in my mind I can be just as satisfied by similar non-downtown attractions as well as the fact that—well, I could go on… but suffice to say at the end of such thoughts I found a ringing in my head that sounded something like “aaaaaas yoooooooouuuuuu wiiiiiiiiiisssssshhhhhh”... and I decided in the spirit of Valentine’s Day (and more importantly, loving my wife) that it was downtown we go. And hey, Horton Plaza has a United Artist’s theater, so we plug it into the GPS and we’re on our way.

Well so far we’ve had two big strikes in my book… the zoo being closed was the obvious biggie, but sleeping in until noon is up there and arguably the causal factor behind not getting into the zoo. So as we make our way downtown, somehow it eludes us to call ahead for show times to the UA in Horton Plaza despite having called a host of other theaters. Perhaps it was our enthusiasm in trying to find some redeeming reason for heading downtown after sitting in all the traffic in some hopes that there would really be something for us at Horton Plaza. How naïve of us.

First of all let me say that as much as I typically hate malls, Horton Plaza is pretty cool. Imagine what a mall would look like if it were 4-5 levels, downtown, and open air. Having said that, it also seemed to mock us the whole time we were there. We exit the parking garage and hang a left, looking for a directory to find where the theater is located. On our way to the aforementioned directory, we notice a couple of those photo booths that Heidi seems to want to do whenever we see one, and I figure hey, why not, right? If it’ll make her happy… but first let’s find that theater. After walking down a ways and across to the other side to the directory, we discover had we LOOKED right when we exited the parking garage, we would have practically been in line for the box office. So back to where we started. Turns out, the theater has ZERO movies we’re remotely interested in, and now we have to figure out what to buy before we leave so we can get our ticket validated. Well, $70 later we’re validated and ready to head out ($7 for parking isn’t sounding so bad at this point).

Oh but now to the business of the photo booth. The nice gentleman at the ice cream shop breaks my $20 and we hop on in. It snaps 4 pics and says to wait 1-2 minutes for them to print. The pics show up on the little screen outside the booth and they’re actually not that bad. Cool. So we wait. And wait. We’re talking like we’re discussing something important and checking our phones and all but in reality we realize we’ve been standing there for probably 6 minutes. Fantastic. Well we didn’t come this far to leave empty-handed so we head over to the other nearby photo booth. There’s a line for this one (now we know why there wasn’t one for the other perhaps) but at least we know it works. So another $3 later and we’re getting 4 more pics snapped. Only these ones aren’t as good because, well, I’m pissed. Oh well… we may as well swing by the other booth on our way out to make sure there’s no activity before we leave. Nada, but hey—at least the machine froze leaving our pictures on the outside screen for all the world to see. But since the pics were decent enough, we think it might be worth trying to see if loading it up again yields any result. But we’re out of singles, so Heidi swipes her CC and it authorizes another $3. Aaaaand nothing. The screen doesn’t even change inside the booth. But I happen to notice a phone number to “call if you experience problems.” At this point I’m open to anything, so Heidi dials it up and gets a recording that informs her that due to ADVERSE WEATHER CONDITIONS the office is closed. But hey, they give us the option of leaving a message and we might get our $6 back. Splendid.

That was strike three and then some in my book, but I know Heidi loves Horton Plaza and like I said, we’re together, right? At this point it’s looking like our desire to see a movie and our late dinner reservations are mutually exclusive, so we’ve got to decide which we’d rather do. As we’re back on the road towards North County, we decide to swing by the Edwards Mira Mesa since we opted to take the I-15 and the theater is just off the freeway. No point in calling ahead for show times as we’d be arriving by the time I got to the desired information in their recording anyways. Naturally, there’s only one remaining show time for what we want to see, and it’s too late. But hey, at least we got a parking spot near the front row. And I even poached for it… Heidi was so proud.

As we’re back on the I-15 northbound, we had enough travel time for me to call Edwards again as well as call a couple other restaurants and see what our chances are for getting a table without reservations on Valentine’s Day (in an attempt to have our cake and eat it too… dinner AND a movie isn’t too much to ask for, is it?). In our first break of the evening, we find there’s no wait at Bruno’s (a nice Italian place walking distance from our Edwards) and there’s a decent movie show time to boot. Dinner and a movie it is. Fantastic. And both turned out to be just that. Oh—except for the man sitting behind us in the theater who fell asleep about four times snoring louder than the T-Rex roars from “Night at the Museum”… I mean, seriously, THX had NOTHING on this guy.

I’ll leave the rest of the night up to your imagination, but I think it’s safe to say I had the soundest night’s sleep I’ve had in a long time (excluding of course the miracle sleep I experienced on Bill and Cherise’s futon… I did not know such sleep existed… what in the world). But at the end of the day I realized despite many plans going awry, I love spending time with my wife and that indeed made it worthwhile. Hope you all (Rick) had as great a Valentine’s Day as us!

Reminders

Birthdays... a day of celebrating a life. Perhaps a day for remembrance and reflection of years gone by. Today is such a day, as today Chris McKeighen would have turned 35. Another reminder of the tragedy of his passing. I'm sure as time goes on, plenty of other reminders are in store.

Even as I write this, the song I'm listening to offers two other reminders. I haven't listened to this band in awhile, but they're one of my favorites. But the band isn't around anymore, and there has been talk of infidelity, betrayal and a marriage failed. Rumors aside, I'm reminded of how sinful we are. We live in a broken world. Chris evidenced that. But as I listen to the words of this song, I'm also reminded that "man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God." In the midst of our darkness, God speaks. He spoke across all of time and history in the person of Christ, and He speaks to us as we read His words in the Bible. So I'm reminded to listen.

I remember Chris today, and I think of all the people that are hurting... real, deep, soulful hurt. But by God's grace, He's willing and able to give us what we need instead of what we want (and what we deserve). As C.S. Lewis said, "we are like ignorant children who want to continue making mud pies in a slum because we cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a vacation at the sea." God offers something far greater--the message of redemption speaks to our truest need, and we may be surprised to discover once we taste and see that it gives answer for our deepest wanting as well.

Musings of a super-nothing

I could say or think that I aspire to be a "super-Christian" or a "super-servant"... but even in those desires exists the seed in my flesh to bear fruit of self-righteous accomplishment. As I reflect on the picture of a radical life lived for Christ--one that the world pities as a "throw-away life" (see 1 Corinthians 15:19) and one that is lived so fulfilled in Christ that the world's charm has been rendered almost ineffective--there still exists a thought of pride in attaining such a life. Beginning the statement with "I want to become..." is almost dangerously detouring when the end goal should be to glorify God by being fulfilled in Him. Maybe it's better to start with "I am nothing..." and so savor the joy of knowing Christ, because HE is my everything. It's the only place of true identity, and by His grace alone will my life reflect His holiness in external ways.

Wednesday

Wednesday. [sigh] Two weeks ago today my wife’s brother had his life come to an end. But it didn’t just come to an end; his life was ended by his own hand. His name was Christopher.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately. You know, the mind is an amazing thing… the ability to observe, process, interpret, discover. I believe it’s a gift. But I also believe it’s a gift that needs to be used according to the purpose of the Giver. In the twelfth chapter in Paul’s epistle to the Romans, we are called to “be transformed by the renewal of your mind.” We can worship the God of the universe with our minds. But the mind can also be our undoing, as I believe it was with Chris. Twice in the book of Proverbs does Solomon say that “there is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.” It is possible—and unfortunately quite common—that we limit what our minds take notice of and observe to merely the negative, that we process those observations in ways that skew perspective, that we interpret by blowing out of proportion, and in the end the discoveries are less than stellar and speak untruth to our own selves. The prophet Jeremiah aptly states that “the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” So it is with great care that I think.

There’s a book out that I’ve seen around entitled “Battlefield of the Mind.” I haven’t read it so I can’t comment as to whether or not it’s any good. But the title is quite apropos. There truly is a battle raging for and amidst our thoughts. And it is only corollary that our actions result from our thinking. But the apostle Paul understood this battle when he wrote “for I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.” So it boils down to sin. And we know none are exempt. “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Sinful thinking, in this case. So we’re told to “take every thought captive to obey Christ,” but we know it’s easier said than done. There is deliverance for those in Christ—Paul recognizes this after explaining his dual nature… “thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!” And just prior to Jeremiah’s warning against the deceitful nature of the heart he says, “blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” So we guard our thoughts, perhaps even think about how we think, and understanding the deceptive nature within us we place our trust not within, but without—in the Lord. And He is worthy of it. It’s a matter of perspective.

Having said all that, I’ve been thinking. And it’s interesting how certain things that were common or insignificant now have meaning in light of what Chris did. It’s as if the world is now full of emotional and sentimental triggers. It’s not surprising that much of this occurs in lyrics. I was listening to a Coldplay song recently—and while I’m more a fan of the music than the lyrical content, I was struck by the opening of a song that reads “Look at the stars, look how they shine for you…” The writer’s meaning was probably significantly different than what I took from it, but nonetheless my ears were deaf to the remainder of the song because my mind was engaged by that first line. My imagination had already placed Chris that early morning around 4am—in his Jeep, parked at a turnout overlooking the city, as the war raging in his mind came to its conclusion. Was it a clear night? Were the stars visible? “For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened.” I wonder if Chris saw the stars shining for him.

Was Chris’ thinking so darkened that he was unable or unwilling to observe that which was good in his life? The way he processed and interpreted his circumstances so adrift from reality and the weight of his perceived failures so heavy that the only discovery left to make was that there was no hope? There may be no knowing. But of this I am certain—he was never beyond the reach of the saving arm of God. There was a thief on a cross two-thousand years ago that was promised paradise after a lifetime of sin when he put his faith and hope in the Jesus of Nazareth that hung beside him. I would like to believe that despite Chris’ despair and his desire for a release from earthly suffering, he had such faith—however weak in comparison to the desire to end that which overwhelmed him. But I can’t know, so I trust in the Lord. I trust that He is still good... loving… just… still and always in control. I have peace, but nobody said our hearts wouldn’t break.

People may describe Chris’ passing as untimely. I would have to respectfully disagree. Did God allow Chris to take his life? I believe that He did, or else He would not be sovereign; He would not be in control. I believe that it was Chris’ time. I know that he knew the truth, although I don’t know what he did with it in the end. But it is done. As C.S. Lewis experientially relates, “pain is God’s megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” The pain was evidently too much for Chris to bear, but what a blessing it would be to learn someday that his ears were nonetheless opened before he ended his life.

But now we who remain have a new pain of our own. The question is: will we cause it to deafen our ears as we seek empty and powerless things in which to find solace? Or will our ears hear—perhaps for the first time? The apostle Peter said “the Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.” The God that holds the world in His hand desires relationship with us. An empty tomb that only went occupied for three days testifies to this—however you wish to explain it otherwise. Are we so self-made and self-absorbed that we need some undoing by the holiness of God? The prophet Isaiah felt ruin in the presence of God’s holiness—but he didn’t wallow in self-pity—forgiveness was given and Isaiah found meaning and purpose in serving the true and living God.

Times like these are times for reflection; perhaps a time for drawing a line in the sand. For me, I am resolved in my faith through this—resolved to pray, to love, to testify. I will fail—but there is forgiveness and deliverance to be found in Jesus Christ.


“Absolution” by Telecast

Your holiness brings the friendship I need
Loneliness flees as I feel Your glory
Like morning break around me
As I decrease I find You're released
The rush of Your love, like the rush of Your blood
Lord, it sustains me, it sustains me

Want to tell You, tell You I love You
Just to know You, my sweetest friend

“Awake from your slumber, my dear friend,” You say
“Arise and follow, for I am the way
In Me there is absolution”
I've been undone by Your holy touch
Consumed by the fire of Your holy love
Lord, it sustains me, it sustains me

Want to tell You, tell You I love You
Just to know You, my sweetest friend